Rebirth and Renewal

Thursday, May 19, 2016 4:30 AM

Good Thursday Morning!!

It is Spring and beautiful!  Be carefree!  Enjoy and love your life!
  When I saw this Free People dress, I had to have it. I absolutely love to wear dresses all Spring and Summer.  The longer sleeve on this particular dress is just perfect for Spring weather. 

 What I wore:

They say Spring is a time of rebirth and renewal.
Saying 'goodbye' to the old and 'hello' to the new.
Babies are born, things are in bloom, everywhere we look things are new, and fresh.
We Spring clean and get rid of clutter.  Not only should we do this with our surroundings, but in our minds.  Rid ourselves of our blockages, things that hold us back and toxic relationships.

Let's face it, more of us than not have had a toxic relationship. Whether it is with a parent, friend, or significant other, it is always hard to break ties with a toxic person.  Recently I have been trying to help a friend get out of, and over a very harmful relationship.  I can see it is still too fresh and she has quite a road ahead of her, but having been there all I can do is be supportive and remind her that she is worth and deserves so much more.

Here are some identifying factors or a toxic person:

1. Nothing will ever be their fault... ever. 
They lie, steal, cheat, provoke arguments... but it is never their fault.

2. They are never there for you. Ever. No matter what.
 They will ruin birthdays, holidays, or any day that is important.  If you need them, they are no where to be found.

3. They are always the 'tragic' victim.
They have no money, their job stinks, everyone is against them

4.  They will never see you, your need, your love, your pain, your loneliness, your accomplishments.
Everything is about them... always.

5. Their way or the highway.  
They can flip flop on an issue or idea, but you ALWAYS have to be on board.

6. They never admit they are wrong. Ever.

7. Silent treatments and neglect can and do go on for weeks at a time, ESPECIALLY if you point out one of their flaws. 

8. When you finally leave or cut ties, they make stories up about you.
You know the one with a crazy ex, crazy mom, no friends because they all betrayed him/her.

9.  While you do everything possible for your relationship, they do nothing, except point out that you do nothing. 

10.  They are verbally abusive. 

Here are some tools to help, when you are finally ready...

1. Delete and block them from your phone. 
because they are manipulative and can weasel back in at a weak moment.

2. DO NOT EVER look at their social media
It only hurts you.  It prevents you from moving forward. Block all social media.

3. Remind yourself daily that the negative opinion they have of you and all of the negative things they said to you are just not true. 
 It is their own insecurities.  They try to break you, to have control of you.

4. Know your worth
You should never continue a relationship with anyone who makes you feel bad about yourself.
Relationships are supportive, loving, and not hurtful.

5. Take care of yourself and look your best
Work out, eat right and take care of yourself!

6. Recognize the addictive game
As human beings we naturally try to prove ourselves to those who reject us. Sometimes we can trick ourselves into thinking there are deeper emotions, when really it is our reaction to rejection.

6. Acknowledge your part
After so many times of being disrespected and let down by these people, don't continue to ask why he or she does this to you. They get away with it because you allow it. Once you stop allowing it, they will withdraw from you because they know they can not control and manipulate.

7. There is always Revenge...

One of my favorite sayings

I hope some of those tips were helpful to you or someone you know who might being dealing with something similar.

Whew!! That was kinda heavy...

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  1. You are beautiful inside and out!! I could've written this post!! I have had toxic men, toxic friends and I am dealing with an employee currently who is toxic and have blocked her from everything. I DO NOT have time for people like this. So good ridence!! We need to love on one another and lift each other up!! Well said sista!!

  2. Ahha I love this! Definitely a great time to renew! In love with the this dress too! Gorgeous!

    <3 Shannon
    Upbeat Soles

  3. Identifying + removing toxic people from your life is SO important; great post, lady!

    And loving your breezy boho dress here!

    Le Stylo Rouge

  4. just came across your blog and i'm so happy i did! its so adorable and that outfit is awesome! such a great dress!

  5. Those tassels are so fun! I love the bright pink!


  6. Those tassels are so fun! I love the bright pink!


  7. I might have to have that dress too! I live in them this time of year as well, and this one is so great! Good tips about healthy relationships.

    Amy Ann
    Straight A Style

  8. what a pretty dress! love the embroidery on it!

  9. Yes, yes yes!! I have this dress in blue and was so happy I finally picked it up. The black looks amazing on you thought and now I want it as well!!

    And beautifully written post lady!

  10. love the dress! this look is cute.

  11. That dress is so cute & it matched your purse perfectly! I love getting rid of toxic people in my life definitely good way to start spring/summer

  12. Hahahaa...great post, beautiful! I love the 1 & 2 tips of how to deal with them. Raw, but true.
    On the ootd, you look very pretty. Lovely dress! :)

  13. Free People makes the best dresses for summer! I love how breezy your dress is and how you accessorized it. Your points on toxic friends are so true-- it's crazy how big of a role social media plays in our relationships. It makes it hard to move on unless you take a leap and unfollow them!

  14. Great post! I have become a self-proclaimed "toxic-eliminator" throughout my years and you are spot on with your identifying traits and suggestions for ridding yourself of the toxicity. So you are wise and beautiful! This dress is fabulous and I wish I had one in my closet!


  15. I have worked on getting some toxic people out of my life and I am so much more stronger and happier since then. I love that dress and the little tassels on your bag really go with the colors on it!


  16. It's so important to remove toxic people from our lives. Not always the easiest thing to do, but def worth it! I love this dress and the embroidered details. So perfect for spring.

  17. I love your sandals! very cute summer look!

  18. I adore wearing dresses, and i'm always one the look out for more! Cute dress on your blog, glad I stopped by..Jacqui

  19. It's not easy to get toxic people out of your life! You need to stay strong and these are great tips! On another note, I love your boho dress! Such a cute look!

    Doused In Pink

  20. Hi Elise... It's great to meet you. Let me start off by saying how much I absolutely adore that Free People dress you're wearing. It's right up the alley of style I love to enjoy during the spring and summer as well. And your tips on purging negative peeps from your life are right on point. I recently had to do this with someone who I thought was a friend and have never felt better in my life. Thanks for sharing!

    All the best

  21. Very important info about toxic people, thank you! Also, your dress is so cute! Love it!


  22. I loved this post!! And also I need that bag in my life!

  23. Free people makes the best dresses, and I love this bag! =)

    Be sure to check out my current giveaway here: $500 Amazon Giveaway

    I hope you are having a great week so far!


  24. This post is absolutely beautiful! xxx

  25. Great post! Love your look! xx

  26. Love everything about this look from your hair to your bag!! that dress is perfect on you! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

  27. Such a cool outfit! I love your dress and sunnies <3

  28. Love your look, from the dress to the shoes I like everything. Great inspiration, I like it! *_*

  29. That dress is the sleeves!

  30. Great looks so comfortable. Great post too! Unfortunately I have known too many people in my life that fit your description of a toxic person.

  31. Love this post! I couldn't agree more to get rid of toxic people in your life. Nothing is worse than having someone drag you down with them. Stay strong! XOXO

  32. First of all, love that bag! Second of all, such great tips!

    Lauren Elizabeth
    Petite in Pearls

  33. I love Free People! Super cute dress and love your tips!

  34. Toxic people are no fun to be around. Love this dress!
    Stylin In St. Louis

  35. I would like to have this dress too...
    Cute photos

  36. It's not fun to get toxic people out of your life, but it's so much better once you do! Good luck to your friend, I hope she stays strong and what a great friend you are for supporting her!

  37. Fresh & boho beautiful! Thanks so much for joining in the fun for Fun Fashion Friday!

    Dawn Lucy

  38. I love this honest, raw post! Also, thanks for opening up, it's always hard to do that. PS - your dress is too cute! Love the hem and the print!

    Abby | Life in the Fash Lane

  39. Love this outfit, the dress is so pretty! It makes me really want to spring and summer!!! Kisses from Italy and thank you for stopping at my blog,

    Eniwhere Fashion
    Eniwhere Fashion Facebook

  40. This is the perfect spring dress, so pretty!

  41. Great advice! I'm sending one of my family members here to read your tips. Maybe it'll be different coming from someone else :)

  42. That bag is super cute! I love the tassels! And great advise on "spring cleaning" your relationships!
    Jeans and a Teacup

  43. Love your dress! You are so beautiful!
    Love from {a lifestyle, fashion, beauty, and food blog}

  44. I have been loving this dress (& still do) for months but it is sooo short on me! I wish it was a few inches longer! So jealous how great it looks on you!